K.C. Concepcion – Updated Version of Me

I know I can be so awkward at times
I can be insecure
You can call me naive, you can say I’m a child
You can say I’m so immature
For me to say that I love you now
But you’ll see I will prove somehow
I can be so much more

Someday there’s gonna be
An updated version of me
And somehow you’re gonna see
An updated version of me

And there would be no reasons then
To tell me that I’m just a friend
I’ll be a much better person, you’ll see
An updated version of me

Maybe I should grow a much nicer nose
A much prettier set of eyes
Maybe I should wear more colorful clothes
If it’d help you to realize
I’ve never been this in love before
Never wanted to change at all
Now I’m willing to try…

Someday there’s gonna be
An updated version of me
And somehow you’re gonna see
An updated version of me
And there would be no reasons then
To tell me that I’m just a friend
I’ll be a much better person, you’ll see
An updated version of me…

Maybe then you’d realize
Or maybe you won’t
If and when that happens
I’d still be the lucky one…

‘Coz someday there’s gonna be
An updated version of me
And somehow you’re gonna see
And updated version of me
And someday you would realize
You’ve made awful compromise
And you’d wished that you had what you missed
‘Coz you’d miss a much better person
An updated version of me
You will see…

I’ve been hearing this a lot over the radio the past couple of days. Listening to this song over and over again, I’ve realized that though I’m not quite fond of the way the song is sung (the tune is a very Filipino-ish tune, and is very common in many of the songs nowadays), I have fallen deeply in love with the lyrics. Or well, the song deeply reflects a lot of things I’ve been feeling.

In some way, I think each person goes through something like this. At one point or another in our life, we are immature and childish, and sometimes we experience things that may cause us pain because of this. But later on, the more we grow older and the more we experience pains in our life, we mature and we learn from our mistakes and eventually become better people. As this song suggests, an updated verion of us. We become updated versions of people we formerly were.

People have always said, not to look upon with regret, the things that have come to pass. These things, though harsh and painful as they seem, help us to become the person that we are today. Yet despite that, human nature seems to overcome such philosophical truths, and we sometimes look upon our past with regret. Me, I do that a lot. I always seem to look at my past, and regret the many things I consider to be mistakes in my life. It’s wrong to always feel that way, but  it seems to me that I rarely look at the present. It’s either the past or the future that I dearly hold on to, and when I’m living in the present, I can’t help but think about the future or the past. It’s so very wrong. It’s such a horrid habit.

Which reminds me, I just watched Click the other day, and then 13 going on 30 yesterday. Two movies that definitely represent the emotions that I’m going through right now. So overwhelmed and aggravated. One never feels that they are good enough at present, or they never feel that anyone else or anything else they’re going through is good enough. Humans are such shallow and selfish people, really.